eclipse season has been kicking my ass
Aug 20
Hello friends - I wanted to pop on here to give you guys an update on where I've been, which is not something I usually do. But this time around, I have had so many external life events hit me like a ton of bricks that I am truly incapable of posting and I wanted to thank all of you from the bottom of my heart for sticking around while I'm going through this period of transition.
Starting at the end of July, I have had back to back intense things happening in my life. First, the garage of my building burned down. No one was hurt and thankfully none of my stuff was in there as it wasn't my garage, but it took out both the electricity and WiFi for over a week, which left me calling the company every day to harass them about repairs, trying to find other confidential places to work (since as a therapist I can't just go to a cafe), and largely not being at my house. Then that same week, my mom was unexpectedly diagnosed with breast cancer. It is stage 1, but her treatment plan has been more complicated by a number of factors and I am her primary caregiver. We don't live in the same city, I don't have a job where it is easy for me to take off of work, and - those of you that have been with me a while know this - I had cancer myself 10 years ago so this is bringing up a lot of trauma from that time. I ultimately believe she will get through this, but it is a lot. Then I had my car break down and need a new alternator, which one of my partners was able to fix thankfully but still had my car out of commission for multiple days. Then I had to make the painful decision to end one of my 3 year+ relationships for a number of reasons, but there was a final straw regarding my birthday which was especially hurtful. And finally, right after that breakup, I came down with an awful cold that I am still currently battling, probably because of all the stress from the last handful of weeks taking a toll on my immune system.
I'm telling you all of this not for pity, but because I know I'm not the only one going through it right now. And also to thank you for hanging in there and having faith that I'll be back to creating soon. I have so many things I want to be doing, and it's been very hard to not be able to lean into my creative outlets. My mom is about to have surgery at the beginning of September and then I am traveling to the UK for SJ's wedding (many of you probably know her but she's one of my best friends through Youtube that I've known for over a decade now), but I am hopeful that after I return, I will be able to get back to my creative outlets, reading more again, etc.
If you are also going through a lot right now, please know that I am sending my love. We'll get through this.
See you soon.
xo Sam
Aug 20
Comments